Friday, 6 April 2012

Average Joes 2012 - The Rats Rise Again - Part 1

The Rats Rise Again

It is less than a year since their head coach; Lord Flasheart (Lord Tiberius Derek Archibald Weasel Flasheart to his friends), declared that Skaven side ‘Average Joes’ might have played their last game, but despite that the rats are back.  Abandoning their usual haunt of the RGMB Championship (with currently no 2012 tournament planned), they have been entered into the Deeside Defenders Bloodbowl Championship in the neighbouring province of, um, Deeside.

The Deeside Defenders Bloodbowl Championship

The draw was made last night for the tournaments three groups, with ‘Joes name being draw for the anointed ‘group of death’.  They join ferocious halfing side; The Deeside Ankle Biters (coached by Paddy; a name with a big reputation in Deeside Bloodbowl circles) and the bearded norse warriors of Dave Winter.  Further details of the other two teams will follow in due course.

With 15 teams competing, each of the three groups has 5 sides, who will play their opponents once.  The top two from each group will go on to the semi-finals, with the two best placed third teams also proceeding.  The lower finishing teams in the group stage will go on to play in the semi-finals and final of a runner up competition.  Each side plays a maximum of one match a month, predetermined, the first round and groups being posted below:

Group 1
Group   2
Group 3
Little Si
Dave W
Pete D
Average Joes
Deeside Ankle Biters
Ian S
Dave A
To be completed by 2nd meeting in:
Group 1
Dafydd v Paddy1/2
Dave W v Average Joes
Group 2
Little Si v Ian S
William B v James
Group 3
Grant v Dave A
Paddy v Ian

Average Joes 2012: The Team

The Average Joes side of 2012 has few surprises, with the only big decision being made by Lord Flasheart being to leave his tame Rat Ogre at home, in exchange for more reserves and a better re-roll option.  He is joined on the bench by Ratty McFearson, an assistant manager of dubious quality, but a nice line in bell ringing, and a cheerleader who nobody in the camp wishes to talk about.  The regulations of the Deeside league call for entering teams to be worth 1,000,000 gold – where Flasheart has found this from after his year spent gambling and hitting barbarians over the head with pistols we have no idea.  There is a side benefit of an additional 3 linerats (linesmen) being allowed an extra general skill at the beginning.

Storm Vermin ‘La Fleur’         Block               90,000g
Storm Vermin ‘ Tank’             Block               90,000g
Throwing Rat  ‘Murdock’        Pass, Sure Hands       70,000g
Gutter Runner             ‘Cotton McKnight’       Dodge             80,000g
Gutter Runner             ‘Pepper Brooks’          Dodge             80,000g
Gutter Runner             ‘The Rat’                      Dodge             80,000g
Line Rat                       ‘Dodge’                        Block               50,000g
Line Rat                       ‘Dive’               Block               50,000g
Line Rat                       ‘Duck’              Block               50,000g
Line Rat                       ‘Dip’                 No Skill            50,000g
Line Rat                       Justin               No Skill            50,000g
Line Rat                       Dwight             No Skill            50,000g
Thrower                       The Lone Rat              Pass, Sure Hands       70,000g
Fan Factor = 2 x 60,000 = 120,000g
Cheerleader = 1 x 10,000
Assistant Coach = 1 x 10,000

The ‘Joes first game will be against the fearsome Norse, one of two Norseman teams in this years competition, lead by veteran head coach Dave Winters.  It will only be the second time the skaven side have faced Norse opposition, and long-suffering fans will remember with fondness the 3-1 defeat inflicted  on the bearded ones on that occasion.  This time round is likely to be a different story entirely, and may well set out how this year’s campaign will continue.  Stay tuned for more news.

Pre-Season Friendly:
To shake the cobwebs out of the rats fur a friendly was organised against a High Elf side coached by David Astbury.  The skaven ran out easy 4-0 winners against a elf side in a transition period, short of practice itself and trying to settle on a starting line-up.  Two touchdowns in each half with no casualties suffered by either side, with gutter runner Pepper Brooks claiming two, The Rat one, and finally thrower Murdock the last at the end of the second half.  An amicable start to the campaign.

The 2012 Average Joes team after a quick painting touch-up and varnish respray.  The gutter runners now resplendent in red cloaks.

A few reserves hoping to get their chance nearer the end.

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